The holidays are a time to celebrate the love of family. For children with open adoptions, those celebrations might include birth parents. Here are four wonderful ways to include birth parents in this year’s holiday festivities.

1. Record a Holiday Message

Encourage your child to create a special message for their birth parents. This could be a handwritten letter, a poem or even a video message. Help them create and deliver the message, but make sure to let your child show their creativity by wishing their birth parents happy holidays in their own special way.

2. Plan a Visit

For open adoptions that allow it, the holidays are a great time to arrange a visit with your child’s birth parents. Whether you invite them to participate in your holiday traditions or you start a new tradition on a different day, the time spent together can be an invaluable gift for your child.

3. Have a Conversation

Make sure your child knows you are open to talking about where they came from if they want to do so. The holidays can bring out mixed feelings about birth parents and adoption, so opening up the topic for conversation can be freeing. It’s okay to feel sad and happy during the holidays. Encourage your child to express their feelings freely without fear of judgment.

4. Take Lots of Pictures

Pictures of your child and your family during the holidays are wonderful ways to preserve happy memories, and they make great gifts for your child’s birth parents. It’s a nice way of sending the message that even if they can’t be there, your family is holding them in their thoughts. The pictures you take during the holidays will be treasured keepsakes for years to come.

Including birth parents in your holiday plans can help your child process their feelings about adoption and build a stronger relationship with you and their birth parents. As agreements for open adoptions vary widely, decide in advance how you want to include your child’s birth parents, and plan ahead to avoid confusion and help everything run smoothly.


Author: Destiny Adoption Services

Destiny Adoption Services is proud to support and guide birth parents and adoptive families on the journey of adoption. We’re a state licensed nonprofit adoption agency with four decades of adoption experience, and our professional team of experts includes moms, adoptive moms and birth mothers who provide compassion combined with trusted resources and skills.