Birth parents choose adoption for many reasons. Everyone’s reasons are individual and to be respected.
It’s important to know what adoption is — and what it isn’t. It is a legal process where parental rights are transferred from one parent or a set of parents to another. Adoption is not abandoning or giving away your baby.
In fact, adoption includes you going through a process to determine if it is right for you and in the best interests of your child. It involves you receiving support and counseling to make that decision. If you do choose adoption, then you review families to select an adoptive family.
You also create a birth plan, which describes detailed steps to achieve what you want for your child and you in the future.
According to the National Council for Adoption, “when you work with a reputable agency, you are more likely to receive a higher standard of professional care and counseling. Your agency should never make you feel pressured or coerced in any way as you consider your options. If you ever feel uncomfortable at an agency you have consulted, you should seek alternate counseling or use a different agency.”
When birth parents choose adoption, it’s often because of a combination of reasons, including:
- Lack of financial resources
- Unwanted or unplanned pregnancy
- Age of birth mother can be a factor
- Health problems
- Drug addiction
- Not ready or able to parent a child
- Single parenting undesired
To tell the story of the adoption decision-making process, the National Council for Adoption interviewed birth moms to share their circumstances and decisions. For birth moms Miranda and Mindi, choosing adoption was right for them in their circumstances.
Watch their stories to get a glimpse into how and when choosing adoption can work for a birth mom and her child.
Questions to Ask Yourself
When determining if adoption is the right choice for you, it’s useful to ask yourself the following questions.
Do I Understand the Adoption Process?
Many people still think of adoption as a secretive, and even taboo, process. However, modern adoption is very different than the stereotypical circumstances of the past. Birth mothers are now entirely in control of their adoption plan, and open adoptions are more common than closed adoptions. If you want to have contact with the adoptive family and your child, you have the option to do so.
There is plenty of information online to help you understand current adoption procedures. Check our birth mother resources for information on a variety of topics. You can ask someone you know who has placed a child for adoption in the past decade about their experience. You can also contact one of our adoption specialists to learn about the process. There is no obligation, and it is completely confidential. You can call or text our Tennessee office at 865-392-6261 or our Florida office at 727-202-8966.
Am I Able to Parent a Child Right Now?
Examine your life circumstances to determine if you are ready and able to parent. Parenting is a huge responsibility, and it may conflict with other goals you planned to achieve before becoming a parent. You may have to give up or postpone your own life goals to raise a child.
Do I Have the Financial Stability Needed to Raise a Child?
Children are costly, and while money should not be the sole determining factor, it is a critical aspect to examine. Adoption might be a good choice for someone who is not financially prepared for a child because adoption is entirely free for birth mothers. As a birth mother, you can receive assistance for living expenses during your pregnancy. Plus, all medical bills associated with the pregnancy, delivery and aftercare are entirely free for birth mothers.
Have I Considered all my Options?
You have options for an unplanned pregnancy. Each path has its pros and cons. None of them are easy, but one of them is best for you and your specific circumstances. By looking at all the options, you can eliminate the ones that are not right for you. Examine each choice individually, so you can weigh the advantages and disadvantages to help you make a choice.
Need More Information About Adoption?
Our friendly and caring adoption professionals are available 24/7 to speak with you. Call or text our Tennessee office at 865-392-6261 or our Florida office at 727-202-8966.
Author: Destiny Adoption Services
Destiny Adoption Services is proud to support and guide birth parents and adoptive families on the journey of adoption. We’re a state licensed nonprofit adoption agency with four decades of adoption experience, and our professional team of experts includes moms, adoptive moms and birth mothers who provide compassion combined with trusted resources and skills.